Serving

When I finally realized that I had to get out of my marriage, the big question turned to, “how?” I had asked several times if we could temporarily separate or at least have a partial separation where he got an apartment and stayed there during the week and spent weekends with us. His response was to plop himself down on the couch and say, with his arms firmly across his chest, “This is my house and no one can make me leave it!” I knew that in order to get out, I would have to be the one to leave. But how?

I became aware of a local shelter for women escaping domestic violence and had been told that I could live there with my children while we found a way to make it on our own. Immediately I thought that there was no way I could ever do anything like that. Staying there would mean that I had to finally admit to myself how bad things really were. I wasn’t sure that I was ready for that.

I spent a great deal of time in prayer and meditation, pleading with God for a way out, begging for a way to save my children from the daily fear that they were experiencing. During one of those times of meditation, the thought came to me that I needed to go to the shelter. I pleaded for another way to get out. I was terrified at the thought of going there. I’m not quite sure what I thought would happen if I went, but I knew that I wanted nothing to do with living there. It was at that moment, when I felt so caught up in how difficult my life and decision was, that God opened my mind and showed me a vision of sorts. In my minds’ eye I saw myself in the future teaching the women at the shelter. I didn’t know what I was teaching them, but I knew that they were listening to me because I had been there. I had experienced what they were experiencing. Because of my experience I was able to make a positive difference in many other women’s lives. Once I saw that, I knew it was time to save my family and make the move.

Within a few months of being out on my own I was asked by the shelter to put together a class for the women. After several discussions we agreed I would teach a class on self-care and dealing with strong emotions. For three and a half years I have taught a class at least once a month and have had the opportunity to share what I have learned through all of these crazy life experiences. When I first introduce myself to the women, they don’t always look at me but when I tell them that I was once a resident there, they always look at me and give me their attention. I couldn’t be helping these women if I had not been through all the things that I have been through.

Through all of this, I have learned a powerful lesson. I have learned that no matter what circumstance you find yourself in, there is always, always someone you can help, some way to make life better, some service you can offer. By finding a way to serve, you are able to find peace in the midst of the storm. I don’t believe that God causes the challenges we have in life, but I know that he allows life to happen and always provides a way to heal, no matter what. Sometimes he heals us directly, sometimes he heals us through other people, sometimes he heals us by giving us people to serve.

What opportunities has God given you for serving others?